I did have a look at How To Ask Questions The Smart Way (War and Peace edition) and also the Readers Digest version. Unfortunately it is still quite long.
I think the problem is that those that can't (won't) post effectively probably wouldn't read either of them anyway. My new approach with these sort of posts is to either sit on my hands or to direct them to the FAQ.
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Give a man a fish and he will be back for more. Slap him with a fish and he will go away forever.